Dear Lord

 Dear Lord, I haven't cried this much for a long while now. Nose blocked. Gasping for air. Pillow dripping wet. Feel like throwing up. Head pounding kind of sobbing. Lord, I have been having a terrible time. I didn't even know how to say it in a prayer. I didn't even know how to sing it in a song. I didn't even know how to write it in a journal. Because thinking about it makes me sick all over again. Because thinking about it makes me feel all alone. Because thinking about it makes me build my walls higher. Because thinking about it makes me question you. I have been struggling to accept that people see the world using different sets of eyes. Or choose not to look but to carry the longest walking canes. I have been struggling to accept that if I find myself associating with friends with questionable habits and behaviors maybe I need to do a self-assessment on who I am. On what I stand for. On where I am headed. I have been struggling to accept that the people I love th

  Dear Lord, Abba father, who art in heaven. Hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass agains us. Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from all evil. For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory, in Jesus's name, Amen.