Beauty to ashes.

 Dear Lord,

I did not follow the man in his lifetime. He loved sport cars and could afford them. I love big cars and cannot afford them. Yet. Haha. We clearly had nothing in common. However, I have been closely following his death. May his soul rest in peace. What I can't shake off is how the ladies burnt to death. Umlotha. Beyond recognition. In my distress I always cry out to you Lord. I wonder if they did the same, as the flames consumed them. I wonder if they said little prayers. Did they whisper to your loving ears? Loud whispers? ‘Lord, it hurts, please take the pain away?' ‘Lord, keep my family for me?' ‘Lord, save me I promise to be a nun?' ‘Lord, it is finished, I commit my spirit unto you?' ‘Lord, make my death a lil faster?' ‘Lord, I'm not ready to leave it all behind.' ‘Lord, it has been a good life, thank you.' Did you wince when you heard their soul retching screams? Did you wince when you watched them burn from beauty to ashes? Did you almost change your mind and want to rewrite their ending? That they take their last bow in a more humane way? Did you consider how hard it is for us to accept that our loved ones are gone without seeing their bodies being lowered six feet underground? How do we you say goodbye to ashes? 

It is so heartbreaking. How does life pass away so quick? One moment she was here. The next she is gone. One moment she was trying to break free from the seat belt. Meant to protect her but in turn led to her death. The next moment the car was exploding. Leaving her helpless. Unable to fight for her life in her last moments. When all along she had been fighting for her place in the world. Queening. Owning her throne the best way she knew how. 

“And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.” ~Abraham Lincoln

Uthuli othulini. I hope they are in a better place. Death is a phenomenon I still do not understand. A painful death is a phenomenon I might never understand.  Help me to understand the times. Time to live. Time to die. Help me to live my best life all day everyday under the sun. For I now understand that “As for man, his days are as grass: as a flower of the field, so he flourisheth. For the wind passeth over it, and it is gone; and the place thereof shall know it no more." My frame is but dust. I thank you that your mercy is from everlasting to everlasting upon us that fear you and remember your commandments to do them. I pray for a good life. A better ending. In Jesus's name,

Amen.